Parenting your child athlete

Children can best be helped to gain competence and satisfaction through sport by supportive parents and coaches having a fuller understanding of the nature of the changes they experience. They grow and mature, in a psychological, physical and emotional sense, at times and rates which are predetermined. From this we can map out distinct general phases of their young lives as they relate to greater involvement in sporting activity. This is useful in that it provides a template for matching ability, readiness and sport development, in a way which is not traditionally presented to those directly involved.

For parents, a better understanding of the process of change is often at odds with the immediacy of the day to day notion of supporting their children. However, an awareness of the process presents certain advantages. It helps to enable an understanding of what coaches and teachers are working towards and creates opportunities to be supportive of their efforts. It also allows for more appropriate decision making about selecting activities, coaches and equipment, whilst also identifying when a change is required just before boredom and dissatisfaction appear. Most importantly, it can demonstrate exactly what sport can and should offer, regardless of the parent’s own sporting experiences. The notion of being physically literate, initially for its own sake and then as a means of stimulating cognitive development, is not widely appreciated. Similarly the need to present children with problem-solving challenges and to develop skills in a wide variety of situations is a valuable life skill across different settings.

Initiation (0 to 6 years)

Infants watch their world, and the people in it, in order to make sense of their place, so providing opportunities to watch stimulating activities should come first. Parents play a critical role in ensuring that a child’s first life experiences are positive, varied and presented in a non-judgmental way. The choice of what is seen lies firmly with the parent at this point, so it is important that the right balance is achieved between the types of objects, activities and experiences made available. Many are equally valuable provided they are appropriate to an infant’s sensory abilities. The need to discover new and more stimulating environments motivates the individual to develop movement and communication skills. They can now make simple decisions about what is more worthy of their attention. The positive reaction to new stimuli they have discovered is the main aim and their pleasure will lead to repetition of enjoyable activities, and make them more adventurous. As a result they need to become more mobile, which is normally a combination of strength, co-ordination and balance. This is the starting point for all motor movements, which are then refined into skills such as running, climbing and balancing. Periods of play become extended as children become increasingly adept and dexterous. This process of developing manipulative skills happens when child sized objects are physically organised and leads to the stimulation of thought processes and creativity. They transfer kills from one situation to another and quickly learn to control themselves in time and space. The adult role is to present small progressive challenges which further develop their self esteem and personal achievement.

Participation (7-13 years)

A child’s desire to express its ability develops rapidly, through the attainment of generalised sports movement skills, at a time when growth rates slow down a little. This is the starting point for sport for many children and is related to initial involvement in formalised activity. Extended opportunities arise from participation in physical education lessons and sports club training, which often introduce mini versions of the adult activity. Whilst competitive opportunities exist, parents need to consider their overall worth in terms of the extent and quality of experience provided. Integration starts to occur when general abilities combine with fitness and mental control to allow more specialised games and activities to be successfully attempted. Children start to chose role models, often in sport, and begin evaluating their ability relative to their friends. Parents are wise to check that coaches structure activity to maximise personal success from optimal involvement. Children’s increased desire to learn leads them to consider a wider range of competing activities, not all of which could be as useful a vehicle for life as sport. They also more often learn skills in one sports setting and integrate them in another. For example, a basic movement pattern such as football can be used in a variety of ways in a team sport, or transferred to the track environment. Ultimately specialisation will start to occur during this stage. This involves the desire to follow a particular sport and sparks the decision to train, work with a coach and compete with serious intention. From late childhood to the start of adolescence, children start to opt out of things to which they are not suited, largely on the basis of their perception of personal competence. This occurs at a time of considerable personal development during puberty when ability, self-confidence and attitude tend to ebb and flow. Having reduced the number of areas of personal interest, they start to decide how much time to devote to each selected activity, sometimes on the basis of how much pleasure it brings them, or how good they think they are likely to become.

Continuation (13 – 18 years and beyond)

The final performance stage links realisation of ability, with maintenance of interest and a healthy lifestyle, providing the child continues in sport. Self-confidence from physical maturity, emotional stability and co-ordinated support systems can sufficiently raise the performance level to the extent that realisation of getting to higher levels in sport becomes a realistic possibility. The benefits of sport, at whatever the level, become clearer. Those who wish to maintain their recreational involvement will still gain huge participation benefits including improved physical health, good opportunities for social interaction and a safe, productive use of free time. A message to parents to encourage and support their children regardless of ability is critical to their overall development. For those with the ability to aspire to higher levels of achievement, now is the time when lifestyle decisions have to be fully considered. In order for this potential to be realised, the adolescent will have to commit to the sport at the expense, somewhat, of a normal teenage experience. Careful planning is the key to having the chance of achieving real success. This long term plan should consist of simple steps that provide developmentally related activity in a progressive way. Having a plan leaves less to chance and also reduces the chances of performer burnout as a result of having done too much, which may be too difficult, too soon. It also allows those who support talented youngsters to become more involved as they better understand the process and their own contribution too it. This cannot be achieved without a fully supportive family, an understanding school and a child who is prepared to work harder than ever before!

John Brierley